he thought i was a dude.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize