I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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