Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Randomize