Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
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