is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
