p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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