The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Randomize
