it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
