But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
