I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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