On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize