Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(201): View more from New Jersey

When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics

Fav 28 953 3965
share tweet
(443): View more from Maryland

You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.

Fav 21 5558 1553
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(401): View more from Rhode Island

I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish

Fav 14 4647 1040
share tweet
(915): View more from Texas

Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck

Fav 4 3117 1116
share tweet
27 Unforgettable Hookup Texts
Read it at the TFLN blog
(443): View more from Maryland

Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.

Fav 4 2040 1239
share tweet
(517): View more from Michigan

These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy

Fav 11 3609 1334
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(617): View more from Massachusetts

Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."

Fav 31 3004 1086
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(847): View more from Illinois

He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.

Fav 0 739 542
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(919): View more from North Carolina

I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.

Fav 0 38 15
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT