I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
high people should be assigned attendants
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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