Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
