Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
