That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Randomize
