I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
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I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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