just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize