The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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