is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
