On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
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