well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
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