Having a random hookup so left but love u
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize
