Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
