I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
