hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
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