Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
