so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
