What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
