He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
