No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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