I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Randomize
