hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
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