i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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