After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
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