they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Randomize
