i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Randomize
