Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
