Betty ford says i'm here all night
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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