My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
