Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
