She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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