It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize