i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
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