Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
