Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Who died my cat blue again?
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize