I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
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