I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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