my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Randomize