someone threw a dead crab at me
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
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