I just made out with a guy for $7.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.