omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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